Pyrexia’s Crepitus
Living. Adult content. And looking the other way.
Somewhere there’s someone who
dreams of your smile,
and finds in your presence that life is worth while.
So when you are lonely, remember it’s true
Somebody somewhere is thinking of you.
Perhaps what endeared Filipinos the most about Joseph “Erap” Estrada, aside from his “pro-masa” image, is how game he was with almost everyone who makes fun of him. Well, not on his personal life per se but on his “legendary” comic character, particularly on his alleged English impediment (which some wags dubbed as “carabao English) and low IQ.
Take this for instance:
Inside Malacañang Palace, a high-ranking cabinet member was looking for First Lady Loi Ejército for the latter to sign some important papers. He looked everywhere but couldn’t find her. Finally, he chanced upon President Erap coming out from one of the function rooms with other officials. The cabinet member walked to the president and casually asked him, “Mr. President, have you seen the First Lady?”
“Why, yes I did!” Erap replied. “Haven’t you seen her? She just passed away.”
Here’s another one.
Erap is singing “Miles Away” by rock band Winger. Here’s his rendition: “Mile away, no; you’re never turnin’ back…”
Loi corrected him. “Hon, namán, it’s not ‘Mile away.’ You should add an ‘S.’”
“Oh. OK.” And so Erap redeemed himself by singing “Smile away, nothin’ left of what we had…”
***
And here’s yet another one:
Ramos: Erap, why do you cry while eating Chippy? And why do you shed your tears on the wrapper?
Erap: Because it says here on top, “Tear here.”
***
Darn it son, I just can’t stop!!!
One particular day many years ago, Erap’s wife was having labor pains. Erap panicked so he called their doctor.
Erap: Hello, doc. My wife is in labor!
Doc: Is she in a lot of pain?
Erap: Yes, doc!
Doc: Is this the first baby?
Erap: No, doc. This is Erap!
***
Okay, Okay, here’s my last:
Erap’s pregnant sister was involved in a car accident and, while in the hospital, she fell into a coma.
When she awoke days later, the woman noticed that she was no longer carrying a child, and asked, “Doc, what happened to my baby!” The doctor replied, “Ma’am, you’ve had twins! You’re the proud mother of a handsome baby boy and a beautiful baby girl. Also, you should know that while you were in a coma, Erap named the children for you.”
“Oh, no!” shrieked the woman. “Not him! He’s not really all
together, if you know what I mean!” The doctor replied, “Well, ma’am, your brother named your daughter Denise.” “Oh, that’s no so bad,” smiled the woman. Then, hesitantly, she asked, “What’s the boy’s name?”
The doctor grinned and said, “Denephew.”
Gosh! Erap…Erap….Erap!
Addicted 2030 Video Gamer suddenly dying. Chilling.
